Fears and Perfection, a interesting dichotomy.

Almost immediately after Josh and I got married, we started getting asked about babies. "Do you want to start a family?" "What about kids?" "When?" "How many?" etc, etc... Whether I want it to or not, thoughts about having children just sort of stick in my head and I can see it starting to affect my perception of almost everything. Unfortunately, that has translated into something I never expected: terror.
Since my perception is more open to baby-stuff, I am noticing more and more stories (from people I know and have friendships with) about all the potential problems with pregnancy, birth defects, and syndromes. And I can honestly say that it terrifies me, so much so that there have been days that I feel consumed by it. I have to force myself to contemplate on the fact that God- who flung stars into the sky and created the mountains and counts the sand- only knows perfection, and that He doesn't make mistakes.
I don't mean to sound cliche, but I am drawn to Psalm 139. Not only v.13-16, but the whole chapter. He knows all my ways. God knows the words on my tongue before I speak (v1-4). God knows my fears and understands them. He has also given me His Word that I may find solace and be reminded of His perfect grace that transcends even the worst circumstances. And I know, even if it's hard to believe, that if the Lord gives us children they will be formed by His perfect and protective hands. That the design and shape of their bodies will be intentional, even determined before time (v16). Sometimes I have to remind myself to meditate on what I know is true and that if things don't go the way I would choose, it doesn't mean my life is out of His control and plan.
I read somewhere that many people use blogs to be more "open" than they could be verbally. I guess that is what this is. But these are my thoughts, and it's better for me to put them out there than keep it welling up inside of me.